an american horror show (michael's hospital catch-all)

[inthesaferoom]

⇏ I feel like garbage
My systems are operating at twenty percent

Or less
I'll walk you through the numbers
I'll show you nothing's left

I can't decide
If I could feel more or I just knew less
When I was younger
Bright-eyed with wonder

I'll lash out if you're in arm's reach
I'm so lost, like "What is happening?"
Like, like
I feel like garbage

Would you move closer if I grew quieter?
Maybe this is you
Maybe you don't fix (me) and you like it like this?... ⇍

Comments

@ hesychia ("you're right back where you started from/never moved an inch")

[inthesaferoom]

Hey if I send you the money for something can u bring it

Preferably with no questions yeah

@ naturedoesthangs ("my ears are blown to bits/yet i crave that sound")

[inthesaferoom]

Did you actually look at more of this data bomb than I did before because I'm kinda

Hmm

@ xmascake ("they're going to put me in a madhouse/now look who's got the knife")

[inthesaferoom]

[ Hmm. He's about to abandon this damn phone of Josh's forever. Maybe it'll be some sort of closure. But he needs to wrap something up first and there's no fucking way he's doing it in person. ]

Stamp SOS for your ass. Don't know why you're not dead but don't come near me again

Think I'm playing? You'll regret it. I promise.

[xmascake]

😘

Gonna kiss you whenever I get outta here. No regrets. Just lots of tongue and spit yeah. That’s what you like

[inthesaferoom]

Out of where. Someone trap you in a basement? Nah you'd probably do that to me tho

You're not even going to know my new number don't kid yourself

Btw please die why haven't you yet????

[xmascake]

You’d like to see me in a basement. I know. All dark and sexy and no one can find us

It’s cute that you think I need your number 😍 like I’ll probably find it out anyway but it’s not like your address is a mystery. Can just kiss you there! Not like I haven’t been there already. Lovely home and all that

You’re welcome 😘

[inthesaferoom]

You know I can move right

More importantly I can make your life a problem if I go back to certain shit

(all my life, learning how far we will not go, but, the beast still grows?)

[playswithbigboys]

Hey bitch

Hear you figured it out. Not going to knock you for taking this long, I had my own moment.

But, you needed Klaus to initiate it? Really? You're not escaping that one.

We don't let freaks do our thinking in this house.

In any case,

Don't know if you're still in the hospital. Don't care.

Just tell me where to go to give you the inheritance I've been keeping for you for years.

Gotta get this shit done. If it takes any longer, she'll kill us both from beyond the grave, okay?

Tell me when and where, my ਮੁਸਕਾਨ. Or else.

[inthesaferoom]

ਰਾਜਕੁਮਾਰੀ:

Hey. Fuck you.

In the hospital yeah. Do some deep breathing first, I'm told it doesn't look great.

Klaus isn't a freak any more than you're weak. Lay off.

Do whatever you need to do whenever you need it, but if you bring your ass of a husband I'll kick YOUR ass.

Kthnxbaaaaiii

[playswithbigboys]

Thanks for the warning, but I'm fine. You yourself just said I'm not weak, baby brother. 👍

I think it would be incredibly funny if we continue to act like we hate each other to everyone else. Keep the mystery alive. They don't need to know shit.

I'll be there in five, maybe ten?

It's not like I was waiting in the area already or anything. Not like that!

[inthesaferoom]

wait you mean I don't hate you? News to me

No I'm fucking with you. HAVE TO KEEP THE MYSTERY ALIVE.

So hurry up

@ forasecond ("we're taking over the world, a victimless crime")

[inthesaferoom]

Dude okay it's time I stop pretending I don't know anything because this shit is getting real

Especially if you're my brother apparently? Guess we're in this shit together?

Anyway I have something for you

Well

It was for me but I don't want anything to do with it.

You know what to do with this, right?

It definitely works.

We checked.

[forasecond]

Where did you get that?

[He was just considering texting the guy himself to welcome him to the idiocy that is this family but..here we are, instead.]

[inthesaferoom]

Lila

Don't come at her, she didn't know she had it. Obviously.

Maimin apparently -

Never mind on that. Let's just say it's a gift from the Handler and leave it at that.

Unless I have to say more.

[forasecond]

How did she not know she had it with her?

If you have more, I want more.
I want everything you know.

Where and when is it set for?

[inthesaferoom]

Locked package. Didn't open it. Would you do something that kind of parent said not to?

I don't know

I'm not touching this shit, my mom only got sick after she broke hers apart

I'm not getting sick too

@ ratmanreed ("깊이 더 파고들어, my bullet goes 탕탕탕 이건, 이건 good shot")

[inthesaferoom]

[ Look, Mike is stir crazy from this fucking place. They'd taken everything out of him that morning with the idea they were sending him home that day, but now it wasn't happening? Kinda his fault, a prerequisite to going home was to eat and he just hasn't managed it.

He doesn't feel like forcing it either, that doesn't feel like it would be great for Cricket #2.

So instead, he's kind of sulking as he messes with shit the hospitality cart gave him. You're definitely supposed to fill out Picross by ignoring the numbers and filling in boxes to make a dick shape out of them, right?

Clearly the only way. ]

[ratmanreed]

[ Gavin knocks exactly once, a little hesitantly, before opening the door. Doesn’t want to wake up Mike if he’s sleeping, but it is what it is.

He had to go tend to the cats, considering he’s surrounded by dipshits, especially dipshit Nines. Gazillion dollar android too stupid to feed the cats, preferring instead to fixate on Killer, for some reason. Just sitting on the couch and staring. His new nemesis.

Regardless, Gavin’s back. He could’ve showered at home, could have at least changed clothes, but he really wanted to get back to Mike ASAP. It felt eerie, anyway; didn’t feel like a home without Mike. ]

How are you, uh. Feeling?

[ Gavin just stands in the middle of the room, hands tucked into his pants pockets. ]

[inthesaferoom]

[ Mike is just sitting here, messing with these stupid puzzles and he has his earbuds in. The music is frankly too fucking loud but he doesn't care. But what this means is he doesn't hear Gavin come in. He doesn't notice until he happens to look up and he's so startled he jerks his hand, accidentally drawing a big blue line across his paper. ]

?!

[ He yanks the earbuds out and drops them on the bedside table. Pushes the whole thing away. ]

Hey. Get over here.

[ It's probably not optional? Definitely not a choice, actually. ]

[ratmanreed]

Why so surprised? You look like you’re expecting someone else.

[ It’s meant to be a joke, not even a particularly mean one, but then he remembers — well. Everything that’s happened recently. The cheating, and all that. ]

I mean —

[ He scowls at his own stupidity before shuffling over to the bed. ]

You know what I mean. Hey.

[inthesaferoom]

Because I was blasting my own ears out? Didn't hear you come in.

[ He didn't bother to pause the music; it's up so loud the song is apparent, even if the earbuds are laying on a table and not being actively used in someone's ears.

He's not thinking about that other Mike, not even with the kind of reminder that definitely got Gavin. He's looking at him like he's the only thing worth thinking about.

It's not one of those 'this person is the only thing that exists', looks, not at all. He knows other people exist. He just doesn't care at this moment. Everything else can go to hell. ]

Look at me. Almost free. [ For one thing, he's back in his clothes instead of a gown, for the first time in the almost two weeks he's been here. He raises up his shirt to show everything has been removed. ]

Look ma, no hands.

[ Or something like that. It's a saying, okay? ]

CW addiction, self harm impulses, disregard for personal safety

[inthesaferoom]

[ Time to walk it off. Except he can't get far, can he? Maybe that's the only thing saving this kid inside him from dealing with him getting high. He definitely leaves the hospital and aims his body the way of the dealer that gave him both the drugs and Narcan, way too long ago. He figures he'll stop wanting it once he sees the door.

But how far does he actually make it? Some bench a block or two away and that's pushing it. So he just kinda. Slumps on it and feels the edge of the back of it pushing into his neck. He doesn't dare actually do anything he wants to do, but this is uncomfortable enough. At least for now.

His one phone is disconnected for now. In fact, he doesn't even have it, it's back in the room he left. A few texts hits the other one, he shuts the damn thing off.

Takes out the phone he's had from Chris and just looks at it.

Maybe it's time he destroys it? It's not as if he deserves the fucking memories. ]

[ratmanreed]

[ Gavin steps out to go feed the cats and, yeah, falls asleep in his car. He’s been risking driving more now that he knows how to get his alien-ghostie to shut the fuck up.

And that “how” is touching Mike. Does it make sense? Maybe not. Some sort of placebo effect? Could be. All Gavin knows is that it works.

So fifteen minutes with the cats and thirty or so passed out in his car isn’t terrible. The drive back to the hospital is brightened, even, by the fact that he’ll get to see Mike. Soon. Soon.

But then, knowing Gavin’s luck? Mike is gone and his phone is here and, yeah, he’s flipping out. Bathroom? No. After a while of panicked searching, alerting the staff — he checks in on the guy who caused all this in the first place.

No, he can’t talk just yet. But he’s smiling, and a disgusted shiver scrapes its way down Gavin’s spine. It feels weird: wanting to actually choke someone to death. Wanting to kill someone who looks almost just like Mike.

Outside: does Gavin go north, south? East, west? Where the fuck would Mike go and why? Why worry him? He knows Gavin’ll bitch at him for this. So why?

Gavin picks a direction and starts walking. Almost wishes he had one of those weird trackers put in Mike’s arm. If he needs help, he’ll call Nines. But he doesn’t want to; is tired of asking for help, to be honest. Nines especially.

With Gavin’s luck, he ends up choosing the correct direction last. Circling round the hospital, panicking, because Mike could be anywhere by now. Could be a hundred miles away, because...?

Gavin doesn’t want to think about the why. Doesn’t want to think about anything, really — until he sees his dipshit, finally, on a bench. ]

What are you...?

[ A little out of breath: alien-ghostie makes him tired. Seemingly sapping his energy as if to punish him for not providing enrichment in the form of their preferred parent. ]

[inthesaferoom]

[ He looks up. For a moment, he's relieved? Because seeing this guy's is always a relief. Until today when it suddenly isn't.

I could be the father of the other kid too. Like biologically

But that can't be fucking true.

And maybe I just kept fucking him.

He can't be pissed about it, considering? Except the hypocrisy inherent in the possibility . That he's pissed about.

He wanted to leave you

He wanted to leave you

He wanted to leave you

It slams at the insides of his head like a sledgehammer. He shrugs and looks away, not saying anything. Not saying anything at all. ]

MY HEART 💔

[ratmanreed]

Don’t do shit like that.

[ He sits at the opposite end of the bench, figuring Mike needs space. Not that he blames him. Hospitals suck.

...But maybe it’s Gavin he needs space from? Otherwise why leave his phone? ]

I was worried. I am worried.

[ Ignoring his instincts, Gavin scoots closer to Mike. Reaching down to touch his knee. ]